To Mark Or Not To Mark...

...that is the question.  Marking exhibits are one of those things in court reporting that can be as routine as setting up your machine, or a real hassle.  So what's the big deal with marking exhibits?  Don't you just make out a sticker, put it on the document and write it into the record?  In a perfect world, yes, that's how it works.  But time-crazed attorneys often make things harder than they need to be.

Here's what happened to me recently, that made me want to write this blog. We were about to start a hearing when one of the attorneys involved was called to another courtroom briefly.  Everyone else stayed in the courtroom, except the judge.  We were not on the record yet.  The remaining attorney handed me a document and asked me to mark it as an exhibit.  I told him I prefer to wait until we are on the record to mark an exhibit.  I did make out the sticker at that time though but did not attach it to the document.  The other attorney returns, the judge takes the bench and we go on the record.  Then the attorney who previously was absent from the courtroom indignantly stated that she was just informed by her client that something was put onto the record while she, the attorney, was out of the room.

At this point the judge looked at me and I told him that nothing was put on the record in anyone's absence.  Indignant absentee lawyer then stated that her client informed her that the other attorney gave the reporter a document.  I explained to the judge that I did not mark the document because we weren't on the record yet.  I'm sure I sounded totally pissed off when I said this.  I was mad at the lawyer who asked me to mark something off the record.  He has been an attorney for many years but  still doesn't seem to know the rules.  In his mind he was trying to "save time" by having it marked ahead of time, but you can see the kind of procedural landmine this can create.  I was also mad at the client who had such a smug look on her face as she was sure she was "tattling" on me and the other lawyer. 

After getting this cleared up we began the day's questioning.  The first thing the lawyer who tried to have the exhibit marked did was refer to the "exhibit we just marked."  Oh my God, doesn't anybody listen to me?!  This is now the third time I've had to explain that the document hasn't been marked yet.  So after three times the lawyer finally learned and asked to have the document marked on the record.  Of course, this document was absolutely irrelevant to his case, and the judge said so when he refused to accept it into evidence. 

Lawyers do seem to try to play with exhibit marking in order to save time.  You can see by my recent experience though that it actually adds time, and confusion....not to mention making the court reporter mad. 

I do have to admit that I have pre-marked exhibits in the past, sometimes without problem, and sometimes with a problem.  When I worked in the DA's Office the ADAs always gave you the exhibits to mark before we got on the record.  If you've ever sat in a grand jury, or reported a grand jury, you probably know that the presentments are rather short and the ADAs very well prepared.  They know exactly what they're going to ask the witnesses and what exhibits they'll need and in what order.  I never marked an exhibit in grand jury that wasn't used.  The ADAs have got their s**t down.

There was also an extremely organized attorney at the State Attorney General's Office who handled very complex consumer fraud cases on a state-wide basis.  He would often use hundreds of exhibits.  One time myself and another reporter were actually paid a per diem rate to go to the Attorney General's Office and pre-mark exhibits for a half a day.  But since these exhibits would be used over the course of many depositions over a span of time we just put the stickers on them and created a description sheet.  We didn't actually enter then into the record until we were doing the depositions and the exhibits were used. 

But as organized as that AAG was there was another who was just as disorganized.  Again, hundreds of exhibits pre-marked and a description sheet made out.  This one would forget to use certain exhibits, refer to and enter things out of order, leading to a very confused record.  An exhibit index looks pretty crappy when you have Exhibit 1 and then its description, and then the next exhibit listed is number 13.  It leads a reader to wonder what the heck happened to Exhibits 2 through 12.  Those exhibits ended up in another deposition. 

So what to do with exhibits and when to mark them?  In a situation when there's a large amount of exhibits and I know the attorney well and am confident he's going to use the exhibits in the order we marked them I would put the stickers on them and make out a description sheet.  I would only write them into the record once we are on the record and the attorney actually presents them to the witness.

If there's a large amount of exhibits and I'm unsure if the exhibits will be used in their numerical order I would not pre-mark them.  I would ask the lawyer for an estimate of how many exhibits he/she will want marked, and then I would make out the exhibit stickers in advance, but I would not put them on the documents.

In a situation where there's only a few exhibits, I will not pre-mark them.  We do everything as we go along, on the record.   The little time you save is not worth the potential confusion and hassle. 

As I've been writing this blog and I thought about the very organized AAG who used all his exhibits (he's head of the State Liquor Authority now, by the way) I was reminded of one of the funniest exhibits I ever marked; it was on one of his cases.  He was investigating an investment scam where a woman convinced people to invest in, or all things, a double-headed bingo dabber.  Several examples of a "double-headed bingo dabber" were marked ,and quite frankly, they looked like dildos.  It was so hilarious that every time we did a deposition in this case the AAG would take out the assortment of bingo dabbers and place them right in the middle of the table.  They would just be there the entire time, whether we needed those exhibits or not.  He did it just for laughs.  That's one lawyer and his approach to exhibits that I really miss.

Surprise, Surprise

I really love surprises.  But because I'm the "Mom" I rarely get surprised.  I usually organize all the parties, plan our vacations and buy Christmas presents, including my own.  And the men in my life (my husband and two sons) are sort of cautious people who want to check with me before they buy me a birthday present.  I usually just say "Lets just go out to dinner together."  Hence, I rarely get a birthday present, and I certainly never get surprised.  I guess what I really am looking for in a surprise is to think that there's someone in my life that "gets" me enough to know how to surprise me.  For example, I wish someone in my life knew that I really want a pair of Bastad clogs like I had in high school.  I'm part Dutch and my feet were made to wear a wooden shoe.  But of course now the cat is out of the bag and if anyone got me Bastad clogs it wouldn't count because it wouldn't be a surprise.  I'll be getting myself a pair of Bastad clogs soon.

I'm not the type of person to feel sorry for myself though so I won't dwell on not being surprised by material things.  I've decided that I'm going to let myself be surprised by life's happenings and its many twists and turns.

2011 was full of surprises.  I had breast cancer.  I felt absolutely fine and so that was a bit of a surprise.  It was only stage zero and quickly resolved.  I decided to embrace this little health-related surprise as a reminder that I am a vulnerable human being like everyone else.  It also made me realize how much sicker so many other people are and to be thankful that overall I'm pretty healthy.  This surprise also showed me how wonderful modern medicine is.

I had a relatively new friend at this time, Joan, who surprised me by sending me flowers as I was recovering.  I love getting delivered flowers!  And getting those flowers from her not only showed me what a considerate person she is, but also that she valued our friendship.  We're super good friends now, what regular readers of my blog will recognize as a "Tier One Friend".  Finally, this diagnosis happened a few months after starting a new job.  I was surprised at how kind and accommodating my new boss was.

Another surprise in 2011 was that my mother got ill and entered assisted living.  My mother constantly surprised me.  I thought she was going to hold out indefinitely to remain in her house.  But what a surprise  when she told me she didn't like being alone, knew she needed help, and wanted to move to assisted living.  Once in assisted living I was expecting her to be a disaster.   She was a bit of a solitary person and I didn't think she would make friends and attend activities at the facility.  She surprised me again.  While she wasn't a social butterfly, she did make friends and go to events, in moderation.

I surprised my mom by getting her a canary to keep her company.  I expected her to reject the bird as too much trouble.  Surprise!  She loved that little bird and it became a big focus of her life.  I actually don't like birds very much, probably because I'm a little afraid of them.  But when my mother passed away I inherited the bird.  Well, guess what.  I love that bird.  Another surprise!

More recently, this past weekend in fact, I was happily surprised by a couple of people.  I lead a hike for an outdoors club that I'm a member of.  When I met one of the participants, she had on, not hiking boots but sneakers, and she was completely made up in makeup.  I didn't think physically she would be up to the hike.  Also, the first impression that she made to me was that she was a bit of an oddball.  Was I surprised!  I spoke with her off and on the entire day and she was a wonderful, interesting person.  And she had absolutely no problem physically keeping up on the hike.

There was another woman who met up with our hiking group in the middle of the day.  She was an older lady who, quite frankly, was a bit of a pain leading up to the hike.  She called me a couple of times, hemmed and hawed about where we were going, when we had to be there, the weather, what we were doing, etc...  When we finally met up with her and we began talking and walking I found her to be a completely kind and intelligent woman with lots of fun observations.  She even went out to lunch with us.  And by the way, during the hike we were surprised to see a flock of wild turkeys, a gigantic turtle and deer.  I actually gasped in surprise a couple of times.

And being a court reporter, I'm surprised with almost every matter that comes before my judge in the courtroom.  The person who sometimes looks like a hobo, will often be the best parent.  Conversely, sometimes the person dressed to the nines will be the abusive drug addict.

And while I don't want to be surprised with a broken furnace this winter, I will say that I still love surprises.  I've learned that I'm not going to get surprises through parties or gifts.  I'm going to be surprised, happily always, by the course my life is taking and the people who populate it.

I'm Sorry, I Don't Speak The Language

I recently spent some time in the foreign country of Medicaland, otherwise known as the hospital.  My elderly, ill mother had a health crisis that ultimately led to her death and myself and my family members spent a little over a week in Medicaland trying to understand the language.  The actual words the natives of Medicaland used were English language words, and I understood the construction of the sentences they were speaking, but I really struggled with the context. 

Let me give you an example.  My mother had a terminal illness.  She was in the ICU.  The doctor called me in to discuss where we were going with her care because she had no chance of survival.  As I walked in the door of the ICU my mother's nurse said to me, "She's doing much better today."  What????  I thought we were about to discuss putting my mom in palliative care and the nurse is telling me she's doing better.  When a nurse tells you someone is doing better, it makes you question if you should be letting them die.  It really messes up your thought process and adds stress to an already horrible, impossible situation.

Time and reflection has allowed me to understand what the nurse really meant when she said "She's doing much better today."  What she really was saying was "Your mom is a sweet lady, I'm sorry she's dying, and I'm trying to make you and me feel better right at this moment by saying she's doing better."  My mom wasn't doing better, but when a nurse tells you that she thinks your mom is doing better, if you don't speak their language, you don't understand that.  You take the nurse at her word that your mom is doing better.

That's just one example among many that occurred over the eight days I spent in Medicaland.  But I eventually got proficient at Medicalanguage.  Towards the end I was able to communicate very effectively with the natives.  I asked the right questions at the right times.  I listened to my inner voice that would be saying, "I don't get that."  I asked follow-up questions where I would rephrase what they were saying into common English.  I got through it and learned a lot.

But my experience got me thinking about the language that I speak where I live (at least for eight hours a day, Monday through Friday).  I live in Legalopia and speak Legalingo.  This is the language of judges, lawyers, clerks and other court personnel.  To us phrases like, "file a petition", "we don't grant adjournments to petitioners on the day of the first appearance, and "Has there been an adjudication of paternity?" are all phrases that roll off our tongues as easily as "Sure, I'll have another".

We have to remember that most of the people that need the services of the courts don't live in our world.  They hear the words, they know that they're English words, but because they don't live in Legalopia they don't always understand the context.  For those of you reading this that also don't live in Legalopia, a translation of "file a petition" is fill out a form to tell the court why you want what you want and why you should get it.  "We don't grant adjournments to petitioners on the day of the first appearnce" means you should have called us earlier, besides you started this whole thing and if you don't show up, the judge is going to throw it out.  Finally, "Has there been an adjudication of paternity?" means has anyone been named as the father.  Isn't that simpler? 

So my suggestion to those that speak Legalingo is to remember that we're the natives, the general public is visiting our land, and we need to be good hosts and speak as plainly as we can to them.  Save the Legalingo for each other, and speak common English to our guests.  If we did that, I believe there would be less confusion and stress for everyone.

Thank You For Being A Friend

Because it's summer and there's many social activities, I've been thinking a lot lately about friends and friendship. I've been thinking about why some people are our friends, how being friends mean different things to us at different points of our lives, and how to be a good friend to someone.

When I was a kid and teenager my friends were mostly just other kids and teenagers around the neighborhood. If you had to ride your bike too far to get together, it just wasn't worth it. Looking back on those friendships I realize I was kind of a jerk to some of my friends, especially my best friend. But kids and teenagers don't seem to have the ability yet to understand what it takes to be a good friend. I see it in my two teenagers all the time. They're very judgmental and don't cut anybody slack. I wince when I hear them talk about their friends sometimes. I want to scream at them, "Give them a break, they're only fifteen years old!!" Of course, I didn't cut anybody slack when I was a teenager. The downside to that behavior is that this pattern of mean-and-nice isn't tolerated forever. I've tried reconnecting many times over FB with my former best friend, but she never gives me anything more than a polite, curt response. Much to my regret, we're not going to be friends as adults.

When I got married and was a "couple" then of course you want other "couple" friends. When all four get along it's a lot of fun, but it usually seems like there's at least one person in the group that somebody else doesn't like. I've had girlfriends that I liked a lot, but then didn't like her significant other, although she liked my significant other and blah...blah...blah. You can see how this becomes more trouble than it's worth. 

This couple friendship thing gets to be such a hassle that you're almost happy to have kids so you can segue into parenting friendship. I have to admit, I was terrible at this. I was kind of an unconventional mom. First of all, I worked full time while my husband worked part time and mostly took care of the kids so I wasn't a stay-at-home mom and didn't fit into that realm of friends. And at that stage of my life, although I had a job, I was much more interested in being a mom and the job was just for the paycheck so I didn't have "career" friends. Also, I never believed in shuttling kids to a bunch of activities, and my kids didn't want to do a bunch of activities either, so I didn't have any moms from scouting or baseball teams.

Reading this blog you might get the idea that I don't have many friends, but I actually do. I'm a big believer in friendship so I'm willing to be friends with just about anybody who wants to be friends with me. When I was about 34, two of my closest friends were an 18-year-old girl who I was in school with, and an 89-year-old woman who lived down the street. Today, one of my best friends is a 70-year-old man that I do a ton of outdoor activities with.

Following are some tips about being a good friend and cultivating friendship. Be a listener. People don't always want or need your advice, and don't make the conversation about you or your problem. Just listen. If someone is your friend, throw them a "Like" on some comment they made on FB. Send them a text once in awhile. Laugh at their jokes. Give them a compliment. Smile when you see them. Pay for something for them when you're out. Make plans with them.

I've also learned what doesn't make for successful friendships. Maybe I'm going back to when I was a kid, but it really helps if you live near your friends. It just makes it easier to get together if you don't have to drive for 30 minutes to get to their house. Also, I have something called the Friendship Attempt Standard. The FAS is simply that if I've attempted three times to get together with you, you've turned me down all three times, and made no attempt for us to get together yourself, we're not going to be friends. We can try again later, but not right now.

Finally, I want to introduce you to "friendship tiers". Friendship tiers are the level of friends that you are with someone, and what that level of friendship entitles you to in the friendship. For example, a Tier One Friend is like your best friend that you would do stuff with all the time if you could. You can ask a Tier One Friend to help you move or pick you up at the airport. A Tire Two Friend is someone that maybe is a former Tier One Friend that had a kid or married someone you don't like so you don't see them as often. You would no longer ask that person to do a big favor for you, but you may see them every couple of weeks for lunch, you're happy to see them, and you always wish you could see them more if it wasn't for that jerk of a husband they had.

A Tier Three Friend is someone who usually always stays a Tier Three Friend. They never seem to move up and down the tiers. They're like a cousin or friend of your Tier One Friend. You enjoy their company when you see them, you see them pretty regularly through your Tier One Friend, but you don't ever get together independently with them. A Tier Four Friend is a situational friend. They're maybe someone you went to college with who now lives in your neighborhood and your kids play together so you see them in that context. Or maybe they're someone you work with and occasionally go out to lunch with when you have a two-for-one coupon. Tier Four Friends can move up the tiers quickly, if conditions are right.

I want to wish you a very pleasant and enjoyable summer, and I hope you are enjoying your friends, no matter what tier they're in.

Resistance is Futile

I've had a number of jobs and careers and probably the best thing about having such varied experiences is that I've learned a lot about myself and how to function in a work environment happily, without driving my co-workers nuts.  For example, I've learned that, while I really like change, most other people really don't, so I try not to push new things that affect others too hard.  I've also learned that a lot of problems work themselves out, and just by waiting things out a bit, I can save myself energy.

Another thing I've learned and trained myself to do is to try really hard to say "Yes" to new things.  Most people's instinct, when asked to do something new or additional, whether in our job or personal life, is to say no.  Because it's something new and we may not have enough information we utter a knee jerk "No.", and then  miss out on perhaps an opportunity to feel very good about ourselves, learn something interesting, raise other's opinions of us, or maybe even make some money.

Here's a few examples of what I mean about saying "Yes."  My former boss recently asked me if I would like to do some post-production closed captioning.  I'd done it in the past for her, and to be honest, it can be a lot of work.  But then I thought about and realized, first, I would be helping her out, thus maintaining a personal and business relationship that's important to me.  Secondly, it's a chance to make money right at a time when I have a son going to college.  Third, closed captioning is difficult and it's a nice bit of experience to have on your resume.  Finally, I'm pretty sure that my current job is safe, but I like to always have something on the back burner.  Hey, you never know.

Also, recently Judge Jack asked me to do realtime for a hearing impaired person.  I do realtime for myself, and for him when we're doing hearings.  When this woman, who was also mute, came in to file a petition the office staff was going to try to communicate with her with some type of machine.  The machine wouldn't work though, so the Judge came up with an elaborate way of recording her responses on the record using a series of yes/no questions and raising of hands.  In the split second after the judge asked me to do this, I hesitated.  My initial reaction was to say no.  But then I resisted the urge to say "No" and said sure, I would do it.  Everything worked out great.  The woman got the legal help she needed, the judge was happy, I felt good about myself, and most of all I proved that humans, specifically court reporters, succeed where machines fail.

So my advice today is that Resistance is Futile.  Learn to Say Yes!

Random Observations

Sitting where I sit in the courtroom gives me the opportunity to observe some things.  Here are a few things that I've noticed.  I would love for you to post your own observations.

1.  Women under the age of 25 no longer wear stockings.  Why is that?  Most women's legs look terrible bare.  They're misshapen and too white.  Ladies, put on a pair of stockings!  It's not really that much trouble and you'll look so much better.  Control top pantyhose stay up nicely and tuck you in a little bit. I often see pasty white feet jammed into high heal shoes.  That must hurt.  It wouldn't hurt if you had a pair of stockings on to smooth things along.  BTW, this is something I've noticed in both lawyers and their clients.   Writing this reminds me of an dearly departed old dear friend of mine, Sandy Smith-Lipke, who used to say that she wished she had followed an older lady's advice of keep your face out of the sun and wear support stockings.  I'm not even asking you younger ladies to go the support hose route, but for God's sake, please, just put on a pair of Hanes.

2.  If you're coming into court to ask the judge to discontinue an order of protection against you, you probably shouldn't wear your "Scarface" t-shirt depicting a blood soaked Al Pacino brandishing two machine guns.  How about wearing a shirt that says something like "My Ex is a Super Lady" or "Flower Power".  At the very least wear something with the Muppets on it.  But no, you're probably not going to convince the judge that you're not violent when you glorify the lifestyle of Tony Montana.

3.  Lawyers, and even the judge, are very susceptible to a condition I call "Word Fever".  Most contagious diseases are categorized as bacterial, fungal and protozoan.  "Word Fever" is transmitted auditorially, that is, directly from ear to mouth.  As soon as one lawyer uses a word that sounds smart, but is coincidentally difficult for me to write on my machine, every lawyer in the room, and the judge (he used to be a lawyer so he's not immune) will begin to sprinkle that word into their speech for at least the next ten days.  Recently, I heard the word egregious so many times in two weeks, it was deplorable, grievous, heinous, intolerable, preposterous, even shocking.  By the way, all those words are basically the same as egregious, and they're easier for me to write.

4.  If you ask a lawyer how they did recently with a case, if they lost, they will never say "We lost."  He/she will say something like well, we really got what we needed, or well, the most important part of the case hasn't been heard yet.  If they win, they will tell you "I won."  So if you don't hear a lawyer say "I won" right away, assume they lost.

5.  When people come into the courtroom, only the parties involved and their counsel, if any, are supposed to sit in the tables facing the bench.  Often, litigants will bring friends and relatives for support and encouragement.  Sometimes though those non-parties really, really want to participate.  A sure way to spot these people is if they first try to sit at one of the tables, then when told they can't they will sit as close as possible in the gallery to their friend or relative, and lean in as close as possible to them, even clutching onto the bannister that separates the gallery from the rest of the courtroom.  When you see someone do that, you can be pretty sure they're going to blurt out something unhelpful during the proceedings and then I'm going to have to chase after them afterwards to get their name.  By the way, these unidentified non-parties who like to speak out in the courtroom usually have funny accents or speech impediments, and they're also usually the fastest people to walk out of the courtroom.

6.  People make things too complicated with names.  In cases where everybody is supposedly related, kids, mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, aunts and uncles, everybody has a different last name.  Sometimes even married people have different last names!  We recently had a case in front of us where everybody had the same last name, and that was unheard of.  Sad.

Courtroom Chemistry

"The Martha" was sick yesterday.  "The Martha" is what I call our courtroom clerk.  She, Judge Jack and I spend a lot of time together.  Our court security officer changes each week, but the three of us are in the courtroom together, day in, day out, getting it done.  Except yesterday, when "The Martha" was sick.

I call her "The Martha" because she is so good and competent at her job that her name actually defines her job.  She owns it.  I picked this up from an English knight by the name of  Sir William Marshal, who so loyally counselled four kings of England in the 12th century that his successors after his death were simply called "The Marshal".  For his service he was made Earl of Pembroke.  I hope "The Martha" can get a new chair or something as a reward for her service.

When "The Martha" wasn't at work yesterday the chemistry in the courtroom wasn't there.  The person who fills in for her is great, but it isn't the same.  We can't laugh at our little inside jokes. There's not as much energy or fun in the room.  If Judge Jack isn't around we obviously don't have court so I don't know how it would feel without him.  And if I'm not there I don't know if it feels any different for the two of them; they won't tell me.  (They probably don't miss me at all!)

The three of us have different backgrounds.  One is a Republican, one a Democrat, and one a nothing.We have different domestic situations, live in different communities, went to different schools.  But for all of the anecdotal differences in our lives, we share some common ground, and it's that common ground that helps us work so well together.  All three of us like to laugh and are genuinely cheerful people; none of us are Debbie Downers. There is a court officer that rotates through our courtroom that we call "Deputy Downer", and on the weeks he's assigned to us we don't have much fun.  He kind of brings us down.

Another thing the three of us have in common is empathy.  We know we're far from perfect and have gone through some tough times in our own lives.  None of us is quick to judge the people that appear in our courtroom.  We may eventually get around to judging them, especially Judge Jack, but we give them some slack at first.

The three of us also approach the court calendar with the same attitude.  If we have a long calendar, we don't freak out.  Judge Jack sets the tone by saying whatever happens, we'll be done by four thirty.  And The Martha does such a great job of scheduling that we rarely seem to have a crazy day.  In the fourteen months I've been here we only twice stayed on the record past four thirty, and never stayed beyond five.  I filled in one day (just one day!) for another judge and we went to five fifteen, and I'm told that judge does that all the time.  In our courtroom, we take the schedule as it comes, do what we can, and the rest works itself out.

Lack of micro managing is another similarity.  All three of us trust the other two to do their job, and none of us try to manage what the others do.  Of course, The Martha and I would never tell Judge Jack what to do anyway; that's his secretary's job.  But you know what?  Sometimes the judge asks our opinion and really seems to think our opinion is valuable.

Having good chemistry with the people you work with is so important, especially when you spend so much time with them.  If you can laugh with, confide in and commiserate with them, the day flies along .  When I've filled in at other courtrooms the day seemed so much longer.

I guess it boils down to respect.  I would find it impossible to work with or for people I didn't respect.  The voices inside my head would constantly be saying things like "What a jerk." or "Why did they do that?".  I respect and admire The Martha and Judge Jack and it's a pleasure to work with them.

Speaking of The Martha and Judge Jack, I was just told that we're ready to begin for the day, and I wouldn't want to delay getting started on another fun day together.

Why Do People With Speech Impediments Become Lawyers?

I don't know a lot about what it takes to be a lawyer, but I do know that you need to speak quite a bit.  This leads me to the question first posed by The Martha, the clerk in our courtroom.  (I'll explain in a later post about her name.)  After yet another appearance by an attorney with a serious speech problem that left us all wondering at about 50% of what he just said, The Martha asked "Why do people with speech impediments become lawyers?"  Good question.  I didn't have an answer to that, but I did start to notice that the percentage of people with speech impediments is higher in the courtroom.  I wonder if these people went into law hoping their speech impediment would get better with practice and training.   Maybe they actually used to be worse than they are.

The types of speech problems I hear in the courtroom include low mumblers, regular mumblers, make-no-sense fast talkers, false starters, and weird cadence speakers.  I have to say of all these types of speakers, the weird cadence speakers are the worst.  I can usually ask mumblers to speak up, tell fast talkers to slow down, and I just write the false starters with dashes and hope they order a transcript to see how terrible they speak.  But the weird cadence speakers are really a challenge because they're actually saying the right words, but just in such a strange rhythm that I don't get what they're saying until they've finished. 

I used to work as a contract reporter in Bankruptcy Court and there was an attorney who appeared somewhat regularly there.  He said "um" all the time, and I mean All The Time.  A typical sentence for him would be "Um, the court, um, directed, um, me, um, to send all, um, other parties, um, a copy of the, um, filing.  Normally I wouldn't put in all the "ums" because it's more of a sound than a word, and also because, quite frankly, it was just more work for me.  But this particular attorney was very mean to me, and other reporters too, which meant  that I just had to put in all his "ums" one time.  After getting that transcript he didn't speak any better, but I felt a little better. 

I am a voice person.  If someone has a great voice, I think more highly of them.  If they say smart things, I really like them.   Conversely, if someone has a bad voice, nasally or annoying in some fashion, I tend to like them less.  I'm lucky because my judge, Judge Jack, has a great voice.  He's also very smart.  When you make a living listening to people speak, it makes for an easy day when the person you listen to most has a pleasant speaking voice and says smart things.  He does speak pretty fast at times though.  I've clocked him at 360 words per minute!  But that's okay because he usually only does that with phrases he says all the time and I know what he's about to say.  I also have abbreviations for phrases he uses all the time so I can keep up with him pretty well.

I worked for the District Attorney's Office for about nine months.  There was one assistant district attorney there who I admired from afar.  He wasn't particularly good looking, but he had a great, and I mean a great voice.  He was also very smart, professional and had the reputation of being a wonderul guy to work for.  On one of the last days I worked there I found myself in the elevator alone with him.  I screwed up my courage and told him that it was a pleasure to work with him because he had such a great voice.  He was so stunned to receive the compliment that it made me think that he probably rarely ever got compliments, even though he was very deserving of them.

So the bottom line in this post, I guess, is be a bad speaker, and feel the wrath of the reporter; be a good speaker and feel the love.

What the Heck is a Ball of Wax?

I've been thinking a lot about phrases and words that we hear that are mispronounced, misused, or they're just "mystery" words or phrases that get me thinking about their origins.  The other day I heard a lawyer use the phrase "whole ball of wax".  That's one of those phrases I hear, but I don't know where it came from.  I thought the correct word might actually be "bailiwick" and it has just gotten misused so often that the phrase became "ball of wax".  I was wrong.  Ball of wax is the correct phrase to use when someone means all of something.  By the way, bailiwick would be completely wrong, once again proving that I'm frequently incorrect.

In an effort to rehabilitate my reputation, however, here are a couple of words that are said wrong, or spelled wrong that I happen to know about.  Jibe.  People often say "That doesn't jive."  The correct word is "jibe", unless you're interested in "jive talking", a la the Bee Gees.  Jibe means to be in accord or agree.

Gypped is another good one.  I've seen it spelled out like "J-I-P-P-E-D.   It's possible that gypped is a short form for Gypsy.

This brings me to my pet peeve, and I'm hoping someone can either correct me, or tell me I'm right.  When talking about someone taking a plea in a criminal matter in the past tense I always thought the correct word is "plead", as in "He plead guilty to the murder."  But on TV and radio they say "pleaded".  Likewise, in the newspaper it's written P-L-E-A-D-E-D.  Can someone tell me who is right?  These are the kinds of things that court reporters think about.

Court reporters brains are wired similarly.  When I worked in a pool setting (not a swimming pool) with other reporters at the DA's Office we all seemed to like the same types of games, Sudoku, Mahjong.  We also all liked to knit or keep our hands busy in some way.  Is that a common characteristic of us reporters?  Let me know if you like these same types of things.

I often wonder what makes one person able to do this job, while another can't.  Maybe it's the way our brains function.  I'm going to start a list of characteristics right now to be a successful court reporter.  Please add your own.  Fidgety hands.  A mind that likes to keep busy (otherwise known as an inability to relax).  Well organized.  Able to multi-task mentally and physically.  Ability to think very quickly.

These are all positive attributes.  I'm going to throw in some negatives now.   Perfectionist.  Intolerance for working with other people.  Nosey.  Opinionated.

And by the way, there's only theories on where the phrase "ball of wax" came from, but one theory is that wax is a substance to which almost anything will stick, and it also takes on the impression of most anything that is placed against it so that's where the meaning of everything may have come from.

I'm going to add to the list of characteristics the desire to know small useless details like this.

Being There

I heard part of a radio interview with a man who wrote a book about the Inquisitions.  For background, the Inquisitions occurred generally in the medieval or middle ages, from around 1200 to 1500.  The Inquisitions employed various means of persuasion and/or torture to get people to admit to heresy against Catholicism.  The author of the book said that one of his greatest tools in doing his research was the records kept of the actual "interviews" with those being persuaded (re: tortured).  He said the victim's voices spoke to him through the ages.  I was okay with the author up to that point, but then he spoke contemptuously about the "secretaries" who sat in the corners, without emotion, taking down what was being said.  He said they were like accountants, working without emotion.

Do the "secretaries" in the corner remind you of anyone? First of all, they were probably scribes, considered to be a highly skilled profession.  Maybe some of us are even descended from scribes.  My second problem with his remark is that he assumes they were without emotion.  Were they?  Or were they just compartmentalizing their emotion while working so that they could actually do the very important job of keeping a record?  And finally, if these scribes hadn't been present, hadn't done their job without emotion, the author would not have these records to help him hear the voices through the ages.

How do you handle emotions while taking down the record?  We've probably all heard some brutal stuff.  When I worked in the DA's Office I saw some graphic photos.  I have to admit, it really didn't bother me.  Maybe it's because it was photos, maybe it's because I didn't know the people, maybe there's something wrong with me.  Or maybe I'm exactly suited to doing the job of Being There, writing the spoken word and not getting distracted by my own feelings.  I don't know.

I do know that if you're going to do this job you have to be comfortable with yourself as simply a neutral element in the room.  You should not inject yourself into the proceedings unless it has to do with keeping the record (can you spell that please?).  This takes a lot of self-discipline.  But without this discipline imagine what kind of record we would have of the Inquisitions if one of the scribes stood up and said "Stop using the rack on that man, can't you see he's told you all he knows!"  I would imagine the scribe would be the next for the rack and then what kind of record would we have.

Court reporters are masters of self-discipline.  We practice our writing, we bite our tongues, we sit still for hours on end without saying a word, we have to pee, we get thirsty, we sneeze, all while everyone around us keeps talking and we keep writing it all down...just the words, no emotion for the benefit of the record and those who rely on the record, in the near future, or hundreds of years in the future.

Long Live The Scribes Who Sit In The Corner!

Being A "Wordie"

I've called my blog "The Voices In My Head", not because I have a mental health disorder (although maybe I do), but because as a court reporter I am constantly listening, listening, listening.  And while I am listening to the judge, the lawyers and the people they represent speak, there is also another voice in my head saying things like "How can I write contemporaneously quicker?", "Why does he keep saying contemporaneously?  Why can't he just say "at the same time"?  I have a one stroke abbreviation for that phrase."

You've probably heard of the term "foodie".  I guess foodies are people that love to learn about, view TV shows about, and eat food.  I am a "wordie".  I am interested in words and language.  I look up words I don't know (thank you Kindle).  As a college student my favorite subject was linguistics.  I was particularly interested in the different ways that men and women use language. 

Working in a courtroom all day is like working in a laboratory for language.  Most lawyers are very skilled communicators, in the setting of the courtroom.  For example, the judge asks an attorney a question that the lawyer either doesn't know the answer to, or the truthful answer would be detrimental to his/her client, and that lawyer will dance all around the question and never really answer the actual question.  At that point the voice inside my head is screaming "Ask him again!" or "Tell him to answer the question directly!". 

(By the way, I'm absolutely sure that I'm not using the quotes correctly in this post.  Please forgive me.)

Because court reporters are so engaged in everything that is being said, we often hear things that others miss.  Although I must say my judge usually catches all the good stuff.  When I did depositions the double and even triple negative statements that people used worried me.  I wondered if the lawsuit actually went to trial what would happen to those double and triple negatives.  Would they let the person clarify their answer?  Would they assume I made a mistake?  Would the whole outcome of the case depend on that answer?

People make mistakes all the time when speaking...all the time.  We all misspeak, judges, lawyers, doctors, engineers, housewives, court reporters, everybody.  These mistakes just wash over most people, but as court reporters we commit these misspeakings to paper and so we notice them more.  Those kinds of speaking errors become one of the things the voice in my head talks about.

But I love the voices in my head.  They encourage me to write quicker, more accurately.  When I was in freelance they helped me get through long, boring depositions that went past 5PM by helping me calculate how much money I was making per page.   Go ahead, keep talking, I need a new dishwasher. 

There's a very Zen-like quality to court reporting.  There's something very peaceful about sitting at your machine, quietly taking down what everyone is saying, and not have to solve anybody's problems or answer anybody's questions.  You're the neutral party in the room, you and your voices.

Introduction

Hello future friends.  My blogger name is StenoLou.  I'll explain my blogger name in a later post.  This is a blog for court reporters, court reporting students, or just people that I told about my blog.  I have no agenda for this blog, it's just to share my thoughts on court reporting.  For this first blog allow me to introduce myself.

I'm a pretty average working court reporter.  I'm a middle aged mom with two teenage boys.  I've been married for 20+  years.  I live in Buffalo, New York.  I had two other careers before going to court reporting school.  I have been a court reporter since November 12, 2001.  The reason I remember that date exactly is because the freelance firm that hired me wanted me to start on November 11 (Veteran's Day) but my kids were off of school that day so I asked if I could start the next day.  I was sure I already made my future employers angry with me by being inflexible due to my children's schedule.  In reality, they weren't mad at all.  (BTW, one of my new bosses was my sister-in-law so that just shows you how crazy I was to think they'd be mad at me.)

I worked at that freelance firm for nine years.  I did all the usual assignments...depositions, hearings, courtroom work, arbitrations.  Then in March of 2010 I was hired off of a Civil Service list and went to work for the District Attorney's Office as a grand jury reporter.  That was a job I loved, not only because the county paid for all of my family's medical insurance, but also because I worked for the first time with a group of other reporters, hand-in-hand.   As a freelance reporter I always worked alone.

In the fall of 2010 the State of New York offered an early retirement incentive to its employees and several reporters in the court system decided to retire.  I was on that Civil Service list too, the money was significantly better, and so after only nine months at the DA's Office I went to work for the New York State Courts.

All of this leads me to right now, working in Family Court on a very snowy, windy day in which I can't go for a walk at lunch so I finally decided to do my blog, hoping that maybe this will count for CE credits some day.  I am an RPR, hoping to be a CRR, so CE credits are something I worry about from time to time.

I hope this blog entertains you.  I want to blog about things that happen on the job, the people I work with, my thoughts on our profession, strategies for dealing with work and life's pratfalls. You'll also probably learn much more than you want to know about my husband, sons, dog, and all of my various outdoor adventures.

Well, that's enough for now.   It's Friday, which is bagel day around here, so I'm going to get one of the bagels the judge brought in.